Author: Paul McRingo

Breaking: 9 out of 10 Manchester United fans didn’t show up for work today

Calls for the word ‘Willy’ to be removed from Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory

Sensational Ronaldo continues to score for fun against Saudi Arabian goat herders

Manchester United Officially Not Shite Anymore

Mary-Lou McDonald accuses Taoiseach of having a face like a bulldog licking piss off a nettle

Sam Smith threatens to cancel Manchester gig until the city is renamed Themchester

Taliban submit £5bn bid for Manchester United

Robert De Niro & Lady Gaga on Late Late tonight – Lol, nah it’s Joe Duffy and Twink

North Korea fires long-range ballistic missile at Enoch Burke

Harry and Meghan’s marriage in serious trouble