Woman Announces Break From Facebook Like She’s Some Kind Of F***ing Celebrity

A local woman has announced that she is going to be taking a break from Facebook as if she’s some kind of celebrity. 32 year-old Deborah Bracken from Tullamore posted the news last night to her 252 Facebook friends but judging by the lack of reaction it would seem that pretty much none of them give a shit.

“I didn’t post it for attention so I couldn’t care less.” said Deborah, clearly lying. “I’m just surprised nobody tried to talk me out of it or at least asked me what’s wrong.”

The closest reply to anything resembling concern was from Sandra Cleary – who Deborah considers to be her best friend – who simply wrote ‘Aww.’

Deborah – who has no intention of taking a break from Facebook – regularly puts up similar posts. Just last week she posted “I don’t think I can take much more of this!” As she sat and waited for someone to ask her what was wrong, it was again made clear to her that nobody ever takes any notice of her when the only reply she got was a ‘LOL’ from her Mother.

Probably the most annoying time on Facebook for Deborah came during the ice-bucket challenge craze a few years ago when nobody nominated her. Clearly frustrated, she eventually gave up waiting and posted on her timeline “So I guess I’m not good enough to do the ice-bucket challenge then. Thanks a lot ‘friends’. Looks like I’ll just have to nominate myself.”

Deborah did exactly that and posted a video of herself pouring a bucket of water over her own head. Nobody commented.