Met Éireann – weekend weather to be mixed but mostly shite

After a surprisingly half decent day yesterday weather-wise, Met Éireann say conditions for the long weekend will be mixed but mostly shite.

Sunny spells will give way to heavy showers so if you haven’t cut you lawn already do it ASAP and don’t be acting the bollocks thinking you can put it off until tomorrow.

Saturday – partly sunny conditions in the morning will give the impression that you can go outside and sit in the garden for a while.

However, when you stick your head outside the door you’ll realise that it’s fecking freezing so don’t bother your hole. It will lash rain later.

Sunday – Sunday will begin dry but before you get excited, dry and miserable. Then, before you know it, the heavens will open and a continuous downpour will keep you inside for the whole day. Start googling ‘What’s good on Netflix’ now because you’ll be doing feck all else for the rest of the day.

Monday – As you wake up to another torrential downpour on Monday morning you’ll realise for the umpteenth time that this is Ireland and the weather here is always going to be shite. On Monday afternoon you’ll go online and start looking for cheap flights to somewhere warm and sunny and finally give up on ever getting any use out of that garden furniture set you queued for two hours outside Lidl to buy.

Long term forecast:
Next week will see lots of rain, as will next month and next year.