A new law passed today means armed Gardaí have been given special powers to shoot on sight any women spotted shopping in their pyjamas. The move comes after an alarming rise in the number of women walking around supermarkets dressed in their pyjamas, dressing gown and slippers.
Government spokesman Tom Grealish told journalists this morning “People have been calling for action to be taken for many years and our patience has finally run out with these shameless tramps.”
Mr. Grealish said members of the Garda Armed Response Unit have already been stationed in various Tesco stores around the country this morning and urged shoppers to avoid women in pyjamas so they don’t get hit in the crossfire.
“Not bothering to have a wash and get dressed before going out is unacceptable behaviour in any civilised society and I think we can all agree that a reasonable response to such behaviour is a bullet in the back of the head.”