Putin confirms Prigozhin died of natural causes

Russian President Vladimir Putin has claimed that Wagner leader Yevgeny Prigozhin died of natural causes.

Prigozhin was on a plane that crashed after taking off from Moscow yesterday. Video footage led to speculation the plane had been hit by a missile before falling to the ground but Putin insists that’s just Western propaganda.

“Stop listening to Western media. Mr Prigozhin died of natural causes. He crossed me so naturally, he died. Lol.”

“No but seriously folks, accidents happen all the time. One day you’re walking along, minding your own business and the next day you’re drinking a cup of tea poisoned with polonium. Or falling out of a very high window in a Moscow hotel. Or your private jet goes boom. As you say in the West, shit happens.”

Putin was asked how he can justify ordering a plane with ten people on board, including innocent crew members, to be shot down.

“You’re not listening to me.” he replied. “I gave no such order. Like I said, that’s just Western propaganda. It’s all lies. That plane was not shot down. It was a crate of exploding wine. Lol.”