Government spent €20k on new spatula

New revelations on government spending have shown that €20,000 was spent on a new spatula for the kitchen at Leinster House.

The cost was revealed during a Finance Committee meeting this morning where Minister for Food Barney Fitzmaurice was questioned for over 4 hours.

Mr Fitzmaurice said people complaining about government spending need to calm down and cop on.

“It may sound a bit excessive to the average Joe to spend 20 grand on a spatula but we’re talking about a stainless steel spatula here. Not just steel, stainless steel. And we haven’t even mentioned the solid wooden handle yet. It’s pure craftsmanship, befitting of a parliament building where those of us elected to government frequently dine. Not the plastic shite most people use. See? Not sounding too expensive now is it?”

This afternoon Minister for Health Stephen Donnelly will be questioned about the National Children’s Hospital which was due to be completed by 2020 for €650 million. It is now due to be completed by 2120 for €850 trillion.

Minister Donnelly is expected to finally admit that the hospital is being built by the same people who built the Leinster House bike shed.