Manchester United ask permission to field women’s team in next Premier League game

Manchester United manager Erik Ten Hag has asked Premier League bosses for permission to field the club’s women’s team in their next Premier League match against Fulham on Saturday.

The Dutchman told reporters at a press conference this morning “I need a victory and I believe our women’s team offers me a better chance to achieve this than our men. In fact I think if they were all nine months pregnant they’d still offer me a be better chance than the men.”

United were dumped out of the Carabao Cup last night after a humbling 3-0 defeat to a weakened Newcastle side at Old Trafford to pile even more pressure on the manager after last weekend’s humiliating Manchester derby defeat.

Ten Hag confirmed the club are still looking to sign more players.

“We need to sign more players to strengthen our squad but only in defence, midfield, attack, left wing, right wing and in goals. Apart from that we’re good. And as soon as we find a player willing to sign for us, we’ll buy him. No takers so far. Even Phil Jones laughed at me and hung up. I’ll try him again later.”