‘It’s Easter now’ say supermarkets

Supermarkets nationwide have replaced all their Christmas crap with Easter crap, even though it’s still January.

The appearance of Easter eggs on supermarket shelves seems to be getting earlier every year.

We asked Irish Retail Association President Brian Kelly why they have Easter eggs on the shelves two months before Easter.

“Actually three months.” he told us proudly. “We’ve had them out since new year’s day. You must have missed them. We’re going straight from one holiday into the next from now on.”

In that case, when can we expect to see Halloween stuff on the shelves?

“The day after Easter obviously. April 2nd. Halloween is actually just one day and we believe that’s way too short for such a lovely holiday so we’re going to increase it to seven months.”

So presumably Christmas decorations and everything else will be on display the day after Halloween?

“Actually no. That would make Christmas only two months long and that’s just way too short. They’ll go up in March with the Paddy’s day stuff.”

So there you have it folks. Happy Easter to all our readers and Happy Halloween and Merry Christmas.