Family fun day all set to go in the North as annual flag-burning hate fest approaches

Preparations are in full swing for tomorrow’s annual flag-burning hate fest in the north as tricolour laden bonfires eagerly await to be torched.

As is the tradition on the ‘eleventh night’ bonfires decorated with Irish flags will light up the sky in loyalist areas while local revellers sing songs about being up to their knees in fenian blood and various other Ibrox favourites.

On Wednesday, families will gather to watch fully grown adults marching up and down streets to commemorate a battle that happened in a place they claim they don’t care about and want nothing to do with.

Of course if people gathered all over Ireland every year to burn ‘Northern Ireland’ flags the outrage and condemnation would be ferocious and universal but the other way round is perfectly fine.

We asked Orange Order Grand Master Samuel Winterbottom to explain what exactly is it that they hate so much about pallets. He replied “Is that supposed to be funny? Fuck off you fenian bastard!”

Last year was the first time the BBC decided not to cover the marches live on television, although when they announced they were pulling the plug, satellite channel GB News stepped in and said they would broadcast the parades live to their four viewers, so it’s not all bad news for the bigots out there.