Gallagher Brothers End 12 Year Feud

Gallaghers

Liam and Noel Gallagher have finally ended their 14 year feud and kissed and made up. The Oasis brothers spent the last 18 years publicly squabbling and it was feared there would never be a reconciliation of any kind. However, after they were both photographed yesterday leaving the Dorchester Hotel in London, Liam confirmed the 20 year feud is over.

“I’m delighted. I’m buzzing. This is one of the happiest days of my life. I mean look at the fucking size of him. I look great and he looks like he’s been eating tubs of lard for his dinner since lockdown started. I’ve never been happier. How could I stay mad at this fat cunt?”

Liam was referring to the fact that Noel appears to have put on a few pounds since he was last seen in public. Indeed many passers by asked Liam to pose for selfies and completely ignored Noel, almost certainly because they simply didn’t recognise him. Of course there was only one question on everyone’s mind. Now that the brothers have made up, is an Oasis reunion on the cards? Liam seemed to suggest it is.

“Let’s do it. Why not? Obviously someone will have to wheel this cunt out onto the stage and bring him sandwiches between songs but yeah, I’m mad for it. What do you think fatso?”

Unfortunately Noel was in no mood for Liam’s digs and told him to go fuck himself before storming off and telling reporters the feud is back on again.