UK Supreme Court rules that people born with willies aren’t women

The UK supreme court issued a historic ruling in their Equality Act yesterday declaring that the term ‘woman’ actually refers to a woman.

In a decision that delighted sane people everywhere, five judges ruled unanimously that the legal definition of a woman in the Equality Act 2010 did not include men who have declared themselves as women, even those who have had their willies chopped off.

It is hoped that the ruling will bring to an end the ridiculously unfair and dangerous practice of male athletes who are not very good deciding that they are actually female athletes and suddenly becoming world beaters in the ladies events.

Even more disturbing was the increasing number of men claiming to be women who were demanding the right to share changing rooms and toilets with women and young girls.

Trans rights activist Dolly Johnson, herself a trans woman, said the ruling is heartbreaking for the trans community.

“This is a huge blow for trans people everywhere. I can’t understand how it could happen in this day and age. I’ve been up all night stressing and scratching the balls off meself. It’s so unfair.”