Calls for Ed Sheeran to be executed

Paul McRingo | Political Correspondent

Scruffy nutjobs People Before Profit have called for the execution of singer Ed Sheeran during a heated exchange in Dáil Eireann that took place earlier today.

The far-left political party managed to get the Dáil suspended for half an hour this afternoon by shouting loudly while jumping up and down and banging their heads on their desks.

Party leader Richard Boyd Barrett interrupted proceedings by yelling “Allahu Akbar! From the river to the sea, Palestine will be free! Death to America!”

Fellow party member Paul Murphy agreed, while also adding “Men are women and lesbians have penises.”

The current controversy surrounding Sheeran centres on an American rapper called Macklemore who was the opening act on Ed Sheeran’s US tour. During a September 4 concert, Macklemore gave pro-Palestinian speeches. Subsequently, several US stadium owners said they would not host shows with him on the bill, and the tour promoter removed him.

The decision had nothing to do with Sheeran who has repeatedly said he wants his concerts to remain non-political but who cares about that? The people need a villain and you’re it, ginger balls. Get used to it.