Black Friday Madness!! Save 100% On All These Items By Not Buying Any Of Them

Don’t miss out on this year’s Black Friday madness when prices will be slashed on literally tons of crap you don’t need.

Convince yourself you’ve just saved money by buying something you didn’t want for less than its usual price.

Need a new laptop? No? So what! Buy one anyway. The brand new Dell Inspiron 3000 which normally retails at €800 is now just €700. Buy it Friday and don’t miss out on this incredible giveaway. You’ll think you’ve just saved €100 because you’re an idiot.

Looking for a new phone that not only lets you call people and send messages but also browse the intetnet? Of course not, you’ve already got one. It works perfectly fine and you’re reading this on it right now but so what? Just think of all the money you’ll save if you buy another one. That’s right. You’ll save hundreds of euros if you just spend hundreds of euros this Friday.

Bored with your house? Well fucking buy a new one you tight cunt, it’s Black Friday!! What are you waiting for? Prices slashed on literally thousands of houses for this week only. Do not miss out on this once in a lifetime chance to buy a house. Spend every penny you’ve got. You’ll be saving a fortune!