Muslim call to prayer set to replace Angelus on RTE

The Muslim call to prayer is set to replace the Angelus on both RTE television and radio.

The sound of the Angelus bell ringing for one minute has been broadcast every day on the national airwaves since 1950. However, as Catholicism continues to die a slow death in Ireland, Islam is seeing a dramatic rise and RTE head of broadcasting Tom Humphrey said they need to get with the times.

“In its heyday the Angelus used to get around 3 million viewers every day. Recent figures show that it now gets around a hundred viewers. Unfortunately most of them are just people who can’t find the remote control and can’t be bothered getting off their arse to look for it.”

Chief Imam of Ireland Sheikh Mohammed Abubakr Ahmad Hisham Kabbani Al-Ashi Al-Ali Abdulaziz Bin Mufti Al-Tayeb Abu Hanifa bin Ali has welcomed the news and said this is only the beginning.

“Soon the beautiful Muslim call to prayer will be heard blaring loudly across all 32 counties of Ireland when all of your disused and empty churches are transformed into mosques. Use it or lose it people and you ain’t using it.”

Sinn Féin has also welcomed the news and called for the Palestinian keffiyeh scarf to be incorporated into school uniforms nationwide.