U.S. President Donald Trump has said he’s a huge fan of British Prime Minister Boris Johnson because he’s made people in this part of the world ignore everything he’s been getting up to. Mr. Trump was speaking at the UN headquarters in New York and was asked how he felt Boris has handled the job so far.
“He’s doing great. He’s doing a fantastic job. Some of my worst critics are from that side of the pond but now all they talk about is Boris this and Boris that. It’s 24 hour Boris. I love the guy. He’s made them forget about all the crazy shit I’m doing. I hope he’s President of England for many years to come.”
President Trump has in the last few days alone fell out with Denmark because they wouldn’t let him have Greenland, almost got an American spy in Russia caught because of his big mouth and invited the Taliban over for coffee and a chat. However, events in Westminster have completely overshadowed everything the mad bastard has been doing and he knows it.
“I owe Boris so much. He’s my saviour. Now if you’ll excuse me I’m going to have the Clintons murdered while nobody’s watching.”