Boston Bellends Beat The Nashville Knobjockeys in Super Bowl Cup Final

American Football

The Super Bowl Cup Final of the World Series Championships took place last night in baseball’s biggest game of the football season. As always the game was played in the middle of the night for some reason when everyone’s in bed instead of during the day. The Boston Bellends won and were crowned World Champions after beating the Nashville Knobjockeys by 13 points to 13.

The Knobjockeys made a strong start with a quick goal-shot after tight-end wide receiver Leroy Simpson was side-whipped for an ankle infringement in the flip zone during a throw-ball counter attack.

The Bellends then hit back after they threw a sidewinder into an off-shoot wobble tackle that saw first base pitcher Bucky Johnson expelled from the anchor zone which led to a kick ball penalty throw. Touchdown!!

Most Americans are under the impression that the world comes to a standstill every year for the Super Bowl and have no idea that pretty much nobody else gives a shit. Here in Ireland during last year’s game between the Florida Fucknuggets and the Green Bay Fudge Packers the Leitrim under 8’s Camogie Final was on TG4 at the same time and killed it in the ratings.

The half-time show is as popular as the game itself on Super Bowl Sunday and last night the music entertainment was provided by Coldplay.

Rather than stay for the rest of the game the British rockers left the stadium as soon as their set was over and went straight to the nearest Irish bar to watch this year’s highly anticipated Offaly under 10 girls Camogie Final which saw Cappincur beat Kilcormac Killoughey in a bad tempered match that included 8 red cards and a players brawl at the final whistle.