Local Man Pretty Sure Shouting At Telly Will Affect Outcome Of Football Match

Local football fanatic Brian Hogan has said that he’s pretty sure shouting at his telly during matches will affect the outcome. Brian said he likes to shout orders at the players and tell them what they should do with the ball and particularly enjoys screaming obscenities and abuse when they make mistakes.

“That useless bollocks on the wing really pissed me off last night.” he said. “I told him to pass the ball to that other gobshite but he decided to have a shot himself and sent it into row Z. I mean for fuck’s sake I don’t know why I bother sometimes. It’s almost as if they’re not listening to me.”

Brian’s wife Deirdre told us it’s not just football he shouts at on the telly.

“No, it’s everything really. Football. Athletics. The News. Coronation Street. He just likes to give out shite about whatever’s on. The abuse he gave Leanne Battersby the other night was awful. I nearly felt sorry for her. Then I remembered it’s fiction and the actress who plays Leanne can’t hear him. I just wish someone would tell him that. Stupid cunt.”