The game the world hasn’t been waiting for is finally here as Morocco take on Iran in this afternoon’s World Cup clash in Group B. All over Ireland football fans will be heard shouting “Ah how the fuck did they qualify and we didn’t?” as today’s co-commentator Brian Kerr tries to pronounce names such as Mohammad Khanzadeh and Reza Ghoochannejhad with hilarious results. We asked Shite Panel member Damien Duff what we can expect from this afternoon’s big game.
“Well I’d say we can expect lots of moustaches because most men from those countries seem to have one but apart from that I honestly haven’t a clue. I’ve had a look through both squads and I have no idea who the hell any of them are. I’ll just look at some random Youtube footage of one of the players before we go live and say he’s their danger man. The one to watch. That usually does the trick.”
Duff’s fellow Shite Panel pundit Richard Sadlier however is not happy and has asked Duff to join him on strike until they get to do some big games.
“It’s not fair.” said Sadlier. “Dunphy and Brady get all the good games. When Giles retired I was sure I’d take his place on the Main Panel and then RTE go and get Didi bleedin’ Hamann? A fecking German??? Well I’m sorry but that’s it for me. I want to do a Brazil or an Argentina game too. They always bring me out for San Marino and Peru and I’m not doing it anymore. Why should I always be on the Shite Panel? I’m now officially on hunger strike.”
Will the lads turn up for work this afternoon or will Damien Duff join Richard Sadlier in a dirty protest for better games? Tune in today and find out as presenter Darragh Maloney pretends to be excited at the thoughts of spending 90 minutes watching a game of football between Iran and Morocco.