Brits Invite President of Ireland To Celebrate Partition of Ireland

President Michael D Higgins has declined an invitation from the British government, who thought he might like to attend a church service to mark the centenary of the partition of Ireland. The fuckin’ gobshites.

The service, which is being held in Armagh at the end of October and will be attended by the Queen of England, will celebrate the creation 100 years ago of a weird little six-county sectarian statelet where elections could be gerrymandered and Catholics would “know their place” in society and not dare complain about not being able to get a job, buy a house or vote.

In response to the invitation, the Queen has been invited to attend next year’s 1916 Rising commemoration in Dublin where an Easter lilly will be placed on her lapel and the Wolfe Tones will give her a rousing rendition of Come Out Ye Black & Tans.

Meanwhile after hearing that President Higgins won’t be attending the Armagh event, Táiniste Leo Varadkar asked during an interview on RTE radio this morning “If he’s not going can I have his ticket?”