A local man who recently started a new job is dreading the day his work colleagues get to see what he’s like after he’s had a few drinks. 32 year-old Brian Gleeson from Tullamore has made a great impression with his new workmates since starting the job 3 months ago and is already hugely popular around the office.
However, Brian said he fears all that could change tonight when they all meet up in a local pub for his supervisor’s 50th birthday party. So what exactly is he like after a few drinks?
“Basically I turn a bit mental. I don’t know what it is. I just seem to lose all control of what I do and what I say. One minute I can be having a perfectly normal conversation with you and the next minute I’m trying to shift your wife. I tend to not remember much after the fifth pint so I have to rely on friends telling me the next morning what I did. It’s very embarrassing and quite frankly a massive pain in the hole.”
So what sort of things has Brian done in the past that he’s not proud of?
“Fallen on top of people. Knocked over entire tables of drink. Got into fights. Tried to snog the barmaid while she served me. Fell asleep in the corner and shat meself. All the usual stuff.”
Surely then the obvious solution to Brian’s problem is to simply stop drinking. We asked him if he’d consider giving it up.
“I live in Offaly for Christ’s sake. You should be congratulating me for not taking up heroin instead of nagging me to give up the only source of enjoyment I get from life. No thanks. I’ll just soldier on.”