Minister for Justice Charlie Flanagan has announced that Dublin is to get two new Gardaí and said he hopes the new recruits will be walking the streets of the capital within the next few days. The Minister told a press conference that it’s all part of a government recruitment drive and claimed that criminals will soon have nowhere to hide.
“Once again this government shows that when it comes to crime prevention we’ll stop at nothing. This is a killer blow for the Kinahan and Hutch criminal gangs and I expect they’ll probably just put down their machine guns now and admit defeat.”
In what should be a very worrying trend for Minister Flanagan, crime rates in Dublin have surged significantly under the current government and show no signs of slowing down. We put it to the Minister that two extra Gardaí might not be enough.
“Rubbish! You haven’t met them. Seamus and Padraig are two of Longford’s finest and I guarantee you Dublin criminals will be quaking in their boots at this news. Take that scumbags!”
Minister Flanagan said he also intends to provide Dublin’s Emergency Response Unit with a new bicycle later this year.