Muslims Plead With Catholic Church To Take Sinéad O’Connor Back

Mad Sinead

After two weeks of having Sinéad O’Connor as a member of their faith, Muslims have already had enough and have asked the Catholic Church to take her back. The Irish singer has been posting all sorts of profanity filled nonsense on Twitter over the last few days and the initial warm welcome by her legions of new Muslim followers is fading rapidly.

On Tuesday O’Connor tweeted that white people are disgusting and that she never wants to spend any time in their company ever again. When one tweeter asked her if she was going to spray paint her kids she told him to go fuck himself. This prompted a huge backlash from Muslim men who told her to start acting like a woman of Islam and to stop using profanities to which she replied “Oh fuck off you fucking fuckers I’ll fucking say what I fucking want.”

Imam Ali Bin Mustafi of the Dublin Islamic Centre said this morning “Em, yeah, come to think of it Islam probably isn’t right for her. It seemed like a good idea at the time but we prefer our women to be a bit more non-sweary. A bit more in the background and a bit less in your face. Sorry it didn’t work out but thanks for applying and best of luck in your future endeavours.”

This afternoon the Catholic Church in Ireland issued a statement in response to the request to take Sinéad O’Connor back which simply read “LOL! She’s yours now lads. Have fun.”