Manchester United Win Football Match


The world of sport is in shock this evening after English Premier League whipping boys Manchester United won a game of football. The red devils beat Burnley 2-0 against all odds and gained 3 valuable points which they hope will have a huge impact on the end of season relegation dog fight.

Under pressure manager Jose Mourinho will sleep well tonight knowing that he now probably won’t get sacked this week. Burnley manager Sean Dyche said they underestimated United and admitted that it was a mistake to rest 8 first team players for the match.

“We’ve a game against Bournemouth coming up and obviously you want your top players available when you face that kind of opposition. I honestly thought our fringe players would beat United comfortably. My plan backfired and I’m disappointed but at the same time it’s nice to see the little guys win sometimes. It’s good for the game.”

Fans took to social media straight after the final whistle to express their delight. Joe Bardsley from Salford tweeted “Did we really just beat Burnley? This is the start of something big lads. You mark my words. United are staying up!”

Peter Doyle from Didsbury said “I’m actually in tears right now. Glory hunter supporters of big clubs will never know how it feels when your local team beats one of the big guns. I’m off out to get pissed!”

Meanwhile in Liverpool Anfield bosses have confirmed the club will hold a minute’s silence before their next home game to allow their fans to grieve together. It has also just been announced in the last hour that a day of mourning will be observed throughout Merseyside tomorrow.