Cat That Licks It’s Arse All Day Finds Cheap Cat Food Disgusting


A cat that spends all day licking it’s arse has turned it’s nose up at cheap supermarket cat food because he finds it disgusting. Henry the cat lives with his owners Tom and Marie Dolan in Walkinstown in Dublin and couldn’t believe his eyes when they came home from the shops on Saturday evening with the cheapest brand of Aldi cat food. Marie told us what happened.

“Henry only ever eats top quality cat food but we were late going shopping this week and his usual brand was all gone so I had to get what I could. It was the only one they had left on the shelf. When I got home and filled Henry’s bowl he immediately knew something wasn’t right. He slowly walked over to the food and sniffed it for a few seconds and gave it a lick. Then he made a face like he was going to throw up. He glanced up at me then for a second and gave me the most horrible look before walking away in disgust. I was devastated. He hasn’t spoken to me since.”

Marie’s husband Tom doesn’t really share her affection for Henry. “She has that bleedin’ thing molly-coddled. She treats him like a person. Imagine refusing to eat cheap cat food yet having no problem cleaning your arse with your tongue. I’d get him to eat it no problem. A good boot up the hole is all he needs.”

We spoke to cat expert Pierre van Winkle and he told us that cats are creatures of habit and booting them up the hole is not the answer.

“No, you should never do that. Imagine if you had steak for dinner in a restaurant every evening and then suddenly one evening without warning you were given beans on toast and when you complained the waiter kicked you up the arse. Henry has obviously developed a taste for good food and it’s perfectly understandable that he finds the cheaper stuff disgusting. Even if he doesn’t find licking your own anus disgusting.”