‘Halloween is over so it’s Christmas now’ confirm supermarkets

Supermarkets and shops up and down the country have removed all the Halloween crap from their shelves and replaced it with Christmas crap. That’s because as far as they’re concerned the minute Halloween is over it’s Christmas, even if it is only the start of November.

We asked Irish Retail Association President Brian Kelly what the hell they’re playing at.

“It’s called business and if you don’t like it, tough shit.” said the ignorant prick. “We’re going straight from one holiday into the next from now on. Just wait until you see all the St. Patrick’s day stuff we’ll have on the shelves on January 1st. Oh and Merry Christmas by the way.”

So there you have it folks. You might as well stop moaning about seeing Christmas stuff in the shops in November because there’s absolutely nothing you can do about it.

Just be grateful you don’t work there and have to spend the next two months of your life listening to Michael f***ing Bublé every hour of every day.