John Delaney To Get Away Scott Free Because This Is Ireland And That’s Just How It Is

The government has confirmed that despite suspending funds for the FAI due to the state of their finances, no action will be taken against the man in charge of those finances.

John Delaney was the Football Association of Ireland’s chief officer and a member of its board for over fourteen years. During his time in charge Delaney somehow managed to become a millionaire while clubs all over the country struggled to purchase items many claim are essential for running a football club such as footballs and goalposts.



In March 2019 Delaney resigned as CEO of the FAI and took up the specially made-up position of Executive Vice-President. The following month he was called before the Oireachtas Committee on Sport but refused to take questions. He remained in his new made-up role on full pay until September 28th when he finally resigned from the FAI but not before awarding himself €462,000 in severance pay. Nobody objected.

A government spokesman confirmed today that Delaney will not face any kind of action for leaving the FAI a staggering €55m in debt.

“Ah sure look at, isn’t that they way it goes. What can you do? These things happen lads. We asked John if he’d like to give back some of the money but he said no. Can’t blame him I suppose. Don’t want to be bothering the man too much either. Not to worry. We move on.”

The FAI today promised they’d never make the same mistakes again and said they need someone in charge with experience running such a large operation and taking control of its finances. Former Anglo Irish Bank chairman Sean Fitzpatrick takes over on Monday.