A local office worker has decided that for every 10 minutes of work she does she should spend the next hour on Facebook. Deirdre McGuire believes it’s the least she deserves and that her employers are lucky to have her.
“You can’t be working yourself into the ground.” she said. “Health guidelines say that for every 10 minutes spent staring at a computer people need to take an hour break so in a way it’s the law. I just like to spend my break staring at my phone.”
Health guidelines actually suggest that for every hour spent looking at a computer people should give their eyes a 10 minute break and maybe also stretch their legs but Deirdre sees things a little differently.
“After I’ve typed an exhausting email or finished a gruelling phone call I like to take a breather by watching funny video clips or sharing inspirational quotes or maybe arguing with strangers in the comments section and calling them names like cock womble and fucktard. It can’t be all work and no play y’know. It just can’t be.”
Recent statistics show that more than 89% of us regularly spend time on social media while we’re at work costing the Irish economy around €9 million an hour in lost productivity. Deirdre however doesn’t really care.
“I don’t really care.” she said proudly. “I read online the other day when I was meant to be working that a happy workforce is a productive workforce and I’m never happier than when I’m on Facebook so that means I’m helping the economy so shut your face knob jockey. That’s another one I like to use. Knob jockey.”