There was good news for lovers of Christmas songs today after Chris Rea confirmed he’ll be driving home for Christmas again this year, in his own words “covid or no fuckin’ covid.”
There had been concerns after the UK government briefly considered travel restrictions for the festive season but the husky voiced singer told reporters he couldn’t give a shiny shite.
“Rest assured folks, it’s December and I’ll be driving home for Christmas and singing about it along the way like I always do. Restrictions or no restrictions I’ll be on that motorway and no posh Tory twat is going to stop me.”
Chris has been driving home for Christmas every year since 1986 despite being from Middlesbrough which is an awful shithole.
Local MP Bob Clarke told us “Fair play to Chris for not forgetting his roots and coming home every Christmas. I know if I made loads of money from music I’d never set foot in this dump ever again. I’d have emigrated long ago to some faraway place like Sunderland or Newcastle.”
Meanwhile social media users are being warned not to open a link that’s currently doing the rounds claiming to be the new Ed Sheeran and Elton John Christmas song because it is actually a link to the new Ed Sheeran and Elton John Christmas song. You have been warned. It’s dreadful shite.