Culchie trying to buy Luas ticket from parking meter for over an hour now

A culchie who travelled to Dublin by train this morning to visit friends has been trying to buy a Luas ticket from a parking meter for well over an hour now. 46 year-old PJ Kilmurray from Athlone doesn’t often visit the capital but decided to make the trip today as he has a few days off work.

However, after walking out of Heuston Station, Mr. Kilmurray headed straight for the nearest parking meter, believing it to be a Luas ticket machine. That was over an hour ago and the Westmeath native is now seriously starting to lose his patience.

“What sort of a fucking contraption is this?” he fumed. “How am I meant to know how much it costs or where the money goes? Why can’t I just pay the driver? I swear I’m going to put my boot through this fucking thing any minute now. I knew it was a mistake coming up to this kip!”

Recent figures show that over 2,000 culchies have missed appointments in the capital such as job interviews and meetings after getting into difficulty trying to buy Luas tickets.

However, the situation may be about to improve as kind-hearted junkies have began hanging around the Luas stops outside Heuston and Connolly Stations offering to help confused culchies, telling them if they just hand them the €40 ticket price they’ll get it for them. It just goes to show, if you just look hard enough you’ll see that kind people are all around us.