Taoiseach Leo Varadkar has said in an interview with European TV channel Bloomberg that brexit could bring about the end of the world and the death of everyone in it. Mr Varadkar was in Brussels to find out the latest news on crucial talks that are currently taking place between the EU and the UK to sort out the Irish border issue.
Ireland’s future is currently being decided by Britain and various EU leaders such as alcoholic woman-groper Jean Claude Juncker who the Irish government is perfectly happy to let represent our interests in the talks.
“The Irish border has nothing to do with Ireland.” said Varadkar proudly. “It’s between the UK and the EU. We know our place.
“We could see the troubles return to Ireland within a week of brexit.” he continued. “Who’s to say that wouldn’t be followed by a return of the famine and then possibly a plague that could sweep across Europe and lead to a nuclear war and the end of civilisation. However, don’t quote me on any of that because it’s mostly just a load of scaremongering bollocks I say to please my EU overlords.”
The Taoiseach is due to give a speech on brexit tomorrow in the European Parliament where he’s sure to find a supportive audience.
“I’m looking forward to outlining Ireland’s concerns regarding the whole border issue and can’t wait to see what’s in my speech when I collect it from Mrs. Merkel in the morning.”