Olympics To Ban White Guys From 100 Metres Because What’s The Point?
The International Olympic Committee have confirmed that white guys will no longer participate in the 100 metres because there’s just no point. Committee chairman Thomas […]
Month: January 2019
Local Man Who Heard There Might Be Some Snow Buys 200 Loaves Of Bread
A man who saw on the news that there might be some snow in his part of the country has bought 200 loaves of bread […]
“Brexit Will Bring Plague, Famine, a Holocaust, Nuclear War and Armageddon” – Varadkar
Taoiseach Leo Varadkar has said in an interview with European TV channel Bloomberg that brexit could bring about the end of the world and the […]
“Is 97 Too Old To Drive?” Asks Britain’s Media. “Of Course It Fuckin’ Is!” Answers Everyone Else
After last week’s road crash involving the Queen of England’s mad husband Prince Philip, the question of whether 97 is too old to drive has […]
Now That’s What I Call Shit! – Out Now
Finally someone has gathered all the worst songs ever recorded and put them together to make one huge steaming pile of shit. And it’s out […]
Latest Research Claims Food Is Bad For You
Scientists at the Institute of Research have claimed that all food is bad for you. Dr. Philip McIntyre carried out the study and he said […]
Woman Drinking Pints ‘Must Be A Lesbian’ Agree Lads in Pub
A group of male friends who went to their local pub last night and witnessed a woman drinking pints are all in agreement that she […]
Jobless Jedward: “We’d Busk But Music Isn’t Really Our Thing.”
Dublin twins John and Edward Grimes – better known as Jedward – have admitted that they haven’t worked for over two years and have no […]
Dubliner Genuinely Surprised Man From Cork Doesn’t Know His Cousin In Limerick
A Dublin man who got chatting to a guy from Cork found it hard to believe he didn’t know his cousin in Limerick considering both […]
Irish Nationals Who Wear Socks & Sandals Abroad To Be Stripped Of Citizenship
Emergency legislation drafted today and set to become law from midnight tonight will see all Irish nationals who wear socks and sandals abroad stripped of […]